Those who have had psoriasis or psoriatic arthritis for some time will know about getting into a routine and having the right mind-set to fight both conditions. You need to train yourself into applying creams at certain times, trying to make sure you follow your treatment plan without fail no matter what. Learning how, when other things get in the way, how to adapt your routine.
You also need to find something inside to give you the resolve to keep fighting, to get up every day despite how tired you feel and keep going. Your mind is the key here, it just needs conditioning. I only mention this as I have heard it said or heard people saying similar things. This is great, yes it’s true we do need to get the right mind-set. However, psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis also try to condition your mind.
This has struck me recently as my skin is doing better and my arthritis is not aching as it has done. In fact, apart from my hand, the aches in the rest of my body have been either non-existent or very mild for some time now. The only thing is I can’t get out of the routine that both conditions got me into.
When my skin and joints were particularly bad, if I woke during the night or early in the morning I would have to move. My back stiff or knees and shoulders aching, skin itching. I had to move as the pain of laying there was too much. With itchy skin the first thing you feel when you wake, again you just feel the need to move. Partly so as not to disturb my wife who would be sleeping beside me. Oh and that’s another guilt trip psoriasis plays on you. You’re the one with the chronic illness, the one who can’t sleep properly and feels tired most of the time and you’re the one who feels guilty about waking your partner.
Anyway, where was I? Yes, waking up aching and itching would always lead to going downstairs, trying to get the joints moving and finding the painkillers in a hope sleep may come back. By this point though my brain was usually wide awake and going through the depressing dark thoughts I often had when my condition was particularly severe. Most of the time sleep would not come and I would end up watching tv and surfing the net and mainly noticing that most of the people on twitter at that time were chefs. This only led to raising my admiration of chefs and others in hospitality with the early starts and rarely would I see them complaining. More, you see the love and passion for their work. I know there are other early starters and workers, the night-shifters. These are usually busy working rather than on their way in to work to be able to tweet.
Back to present day. I have been up since 5.50 a.m. and it is now two hours later and I have not found sleep. Not because I’m itching, tired or aching. It’s just something I do now. I actually laughed at myself earlier when I thought about this, thinking if I feel okay why didn’t I just roll over and go back to sleep. Psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis have trained me not to go back to sleep. Annoying because come about 5 or 6 this evening I know I will be feeling very sleepy and by about 8 or 9 I will probably go to bed. My day gets shifted a couple of hours forward. Great to get a head start on the day but when no one else is awake I can’t really do much except write a post on my blog. So you can guess when most of my posts are written.
The challenge now is to see if I can recondition my brain to not wake up so early or, if it does, to go back to sleep for a couple of hours. Somehow at the same time, I have to keep the treatment and fighting mind-set so it is just one bit that needs re-tuning rather than whole re-set. But then, if I do manage to recondition my head, when will I write my blog posts?